Seyoung tells us about her experience in America.

About Seyoung

Seyoung is one of my closest friends, she is in her early 20s, and is currently studying here in America from S. Korea. She has lived in S. Korea all her life but has visited America many times and is studying to get her degree in Business Management.

The Interview

Q: What made you want to study here in America?

A:  I like challenging myself and I thought studying abroad was quite challenging for me. I believed I could learn many things such as: Interacting with foreigners and improving my English skill.

Q: What was the hardest thing for you to adjust to here in America?

A:  I'll say the language barrier and cultural differences.

Q: Was there anything that you did to upset someone here in America or that someone did to upset you?

A:  American people tend to be more honest about their feelings. One day, one of my roommates said "it looks disgusting" when she saw my Korean food and it made me mad of course.

Q: When greeting a Korean in business or out on the street do you bow or shake their hand? If they are of the opposite gender do you greet them differently?

A:  In Korea if he or she is older than you, you should bow to them. If the elder ask you to shake hands, then you can do. But there is no difference when you are greeting someone of the opposite gender.

Q: When entering a room with a group of people what would be the courteous thing to do? Open the door for everyone? Let the ladies go first or oldest first? 

A:  Ladies first.

Q: When you are eating with a group what are a few things people should do or know?

A: No eating before everyone else, and offer a person food while eating. We have kind of strict rules about eating.

Q: If you are dating or married what kind of affections are considered appropriate and inappropriate for public displays of affection?
A:  I think American people are more generous about skin-ship in public. Even kissing in the public is not common in Korea.

Q: When you meet a Korean for the first time would it be okay to give them a gift? If so what kind of gift would be appropriate? Would they enjoy a store bought gift more or a handmade gift?

A:  It depends on the situation and personalities, but I do believe in most cases it’s okay to give a gift when you meet for the first time. Anything not expensive and unweighted presents would be good I guess.

Q:  After meeting a Korean for the first time when and how do you know if the two of you are friends? Is there a specific way they let you know or does it just naturally happen without anyone saying anything? What are some signs of you and your friend becoming very close friends?

A: We have 3 different language tones. One is for elders, strangers and one for friends. If they use the "friends" tone, they are probably friends.

Simon Swatski tells us about his experience living in S. Korea.

About Simon

Simon has been living in S. Korea since May 2008. He first moved there to become a English teacher with his wife and they have lived there ever since. Simon no longer teaches but he works on their blog they started for their family full time. The goal of this blog is to prepare their viewers for living in Korea and educate viewers on everything Korean.


If you want more information on Simon or want to learn other things about S. Korea visit their website Eat your Kimchi.




The Interview


Q:    While living in S. Korea, were there times you unintentionally offended or upset someone because you were unfamiliar with their customs? What did you do that offended them? Was it something that you would normally do in Canada? Did you find out why it bothered them so much or what you should have done differently? 
A:    If there has been an incident, I am unaware of it.  There have been times that I've done something inappropriate in terms of etiquette, like holding my glass incorrectly, but everyone I've interacted with was very kind in pointing out the offences, rather than taking offence to them.  Like "Oh!  That's cute, but you should probably hold it like this," to which we quickly corrected our mistakes.  Nobody has ever been visibly angry/upset over what we've done, from what I've seen.


Q:     What would be an appropriate way to apologize to a Korean you have upset/offended?
A:     In our case, we've established relationships with the Korean people we know so that they know we're trying to be as respectful as possible, and so - if we ever do a faux pas - they're kind to help us not do it again.



Q:     Is there anything that foreigners should expect so that they don’t get offended themselves?
A:      Korean culture is still very homogenous, and so they aren't fully sensitive to cultural/racial differences yet, which is why foreigners will be pointed at on the streets and called "foreigners!"


Q:     When you meet a Korean for the first time would it be okay to give them a gift? If so what kind of gift would be appropriate? Would they enjoy a store bought gift more or a handmade gift?
A:     We did when we first came here.  We brought them for our principals and vice principals:  a bottle of whisky for the men and body lotion for the women.


Q:     After meeting a Korean for the first time when and how do you know if the two of you are friends? Is there a specific way they let you know or does it just naturally happen without anyone saying anything?
A:     For us, it's natural.  There's no announcement of "Yes!  We are now friends!  Let us commence our friendship henceforth!"


Q:     When you are going to a business meeting what would be considered good etiquette when you first meet another company’s representative? Would you shake their hand or bow? 
A:     We just shake hands and bow.


Q:     When greeting a Korean of the opposite sex do you have to greet them differently? Would it be proper to shake their hand?
A:     We shake hands and bow, like above.


Q:     When entering a room with a group of people what would be the courteous thing to do? Open the door for everyone? Let the ladies go first or oldest first? 
A:     We don't go out in big groups of people, so we're not sure.  We just maintain our regular codes of conduct: hold doors for people, ladies first, such and such.

Confucianism: 5 Relationships

In Confucianism there are 5 different types of important relationships.  As everyone makes their way through life and society we interact with these 5 relationships constantly. Through these 5 relationships we become human and find our humanity if we do it correctly. Either way our lives are intertwined with these 5 relationships constantly. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Parent and Child  (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Husband and Wife  (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Older Brother and Younger Brother (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Friend and Younger (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Ruler and Subject (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

One must obey the older one and the other must take care of those under them. If the ones in power follow the teachings of Confucianism  they will not take advantage of those under them. If the ones obeying follow the teachings of Confucianism they will not disobey and disrespect those in power. Doing this they would be able to live in perfect harmony.

Works Cited

1. GNU Free Documentation License. (n.d.). Confucianism: Relationships & filial piety. Retrieved from http://www.lumrix.net/medical/ethics/confucianism.html
2. Mryer777. (2007, July 2). 5 relationships of Confucianism. Retrieved from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nn7grjTpcNA
3. Pilgrim, G. (2011, September 21). Introduction to Confucianism and five relationships. Retrieved from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/introduction-to-confucianism-and-five-relationships.html 
4. The Chicago Education Alliance & the Postsecondary Leadership Council. (2003, May 21).Confucianism: Social relations. Retrieved from http://www.chicagoedalliance.org/John Gifted Class/John Gifted Class/Gifted 200203/Project Void China Jacob/Confucianism.htm
5. n.a. (n.d.). Teachings of confucius. Retrieved from http://www.godpaths.com/confucianism.html

Confucianism: Fundamental Principals

Fundamental Principals

Confucius believed that a person must live by these principles to be considered the ideal man or the perfect man.

• Li -  having self-restraint, good manners, always acting in a honorable way, respecting elders, respecting ancestors, and family members. One should not be selfish in their acts. But still should have personal ambitions, aspirations, and at the same time should not be unjust to others while achieving them. While following social etiquette and mannerisms. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
•  Hsiao - A love for your immediate family and then society. Parents loving their children and children loving their parents. With families happy and together, the society will prosper. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Yi -  the principle of righteousness, upholding what is right above all else, and  sacrificing yourself for it if needed. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Xin - be honest in life, with oneself, and with the people around you. Doing this will build trust and confidence among  those you know. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Jen - This principle is the most important of all principles. Be kind and humane to all around you. Share and understand one another without being judgmental. Even if someone behaves badly with you, think about what has happened to them, and what is making them act like this.  (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Chung - loyalty to one's family and country. Doing this binds a country together. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

Works Cited

1. Ontario Consultants on Religious Tolerance. (1995-2009).Confucianism: Beliefs, teachings, and relationships. Retrieved from http://www.religioustolerance.org/confuciu2.htm
2. Peace. (2008, June 3). Principles of confucianism. Retrieved from http://www.peaceinspiration.com/2008/06/03/principles-of-confucianism/
3. Pilgrim, G. (2011, September 21). Introduction to Confucianism and five relationships. Retrieved from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/introduction-to-confucianism-and-five-relationships.html 
4. ReligionFacts. (2002-2012). Confucianism: Beleifs. Retrieved from http://www.religionfacts.com/a-z-religion-index/confucianism.htm
5. Scott, S. (n.d.). Confucianism: The tenets of confucianism. Retrieved from http://truthmagazine.com/archives/volume34/GOT034139.html

Confucianism: What is it?

What is Confucianism?

• The teachings of Confucius.(1, 2, 3)
• It is an ethical and social belief or philosophy rather then a religion. (1, 2, 3, 5 )
• Confucianism describes the position or relationship of a person in Korean society and focuses on: duty, loyalty, honor, filial piety, and sincerity. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Has an emphasis on: family, bettering yourself, respecting your elders, and respecting authority. (1, 2, 5)
• Stresses the obligations of the people towards each other based on their relationships and places in society. ( 4, 5)
• Confucianism stresses being able to live together as humans, humanity, and the human relationship . (1, 2, 3,  5)

Works Cited

1. Asia Society. (2012). Confucianism. Retrieved from http://asiasociety.org/countries/religions-philosophies/confucianism
2. Farlex, Inc. (2012). Confucianism. Retrieved from http://www.thefreedictionary.com/Confucianism
3. Dictionary.com (2012). Confucianism. Retrieved from http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/confucianism?__utma=1.1588331685.1335064693.1335064693.1335073196.2&__utmb=1.4.10.1335073196&__utmc=1&__utmx=-&__utmz=1.1335064693.1.1.utmcsr=(direct)|utmccn=(direct)|utmcmd=(none)&__utmv=-&__utmk=131256463
4. Patheos Inc. (2008 - 2011). Principles of Moral Thought and Action. Retrieved from http://www.patheos.com/Library/Confucianism/Ethics-Morality-Community/Principles-of-Moral-Thought-and-Action.html
5. The Korean. (January 6, 2011). Confucianism and Korea - Part II: What is Confucianism? Retrieved from http://askakorean.blogspot.com/2011/01/confucianism-and-korea-part-ii-what-is.html

Confucianism History

Before we can start learning about South Korean Courtesy we must first know some things about the strong influences that helped build it, Confucianism. Confucianism has been an important influence on S. Korea as well as many other eastern countries.(1, 4)

Origin

Confucianism are the theories and philosophies of a Chinese scholar, Confucius, of the 5th-6th century B.C.E. in China. Confucius's teachings have influenced China, Japan, Vietnam, and Korea. Confucianism works towards good relationships and peace in any country. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

All of Confucius's teachings were recorded by his students and then their students(1, 3, 4). It was discarded around 220 C.E. when the Han Dynasty fell(1, 6) . In the next dynasty, the Qin Dynasty, people who did not agree with Confucianism were authorized to burn any reference to it(1, 6). Because of this there are many gaps in Confucius’s teachings and sometimes contradicted itself(1). By the 7^th (700 BCE) century Confucianism reappeared and was brought back into practice.(1, 2, 6)

It was later mixed in with Buddhism and Taoism to create laws that state the correct way relationships establish peace as well as bring more followers.(1, 6)

Works Cited

1. Conjecture Corporation. (2003-2012). What is Confucianism?. Retrieved from      http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-confucianism.htm
2. Hays, J. (2008-20011). History of Confucianism. Retrieved from  http://www.factsanddetails.com/world.php?itemid=1175&catid=55&subcatid=357
3. Patheos Inc. (2008 - 2011). Confusianism: Definition, history & origin. Retrieved from  http://www.onelittleangel.com/wisdom/quotes/confucianism.asp
4. Pilgrim, G. (2011, September 21). Introduction to Confucianism and five relationships. Retrieved from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/introduction-to-confucianism-and-five-relationships.html 
5. Scholastic Inc. (2012). Asian pacific american heritage. Retrieved from http://teacher.scholastic.com/researchtools/researchstarters/asian-american/
6. n.a. (n.d.). Confucianism : Definition, history & origin. Retrieved from http://www.onelittleangel.com/wisdom/quotes/confucianism.asp

Introduction

About this Blog

In this blog I will cover many things about S. Korean courtesy. 

• Confucianism 
• Etiquette 
• Manners
• Acceptable behavior and In-acceptable behavior
• Non-verbal communication

These are only a few and I will not be going over them in this exact order. Also many of these will overlap with one another.

About Me

Hello my name is Melonie, I am 27-years-old, and I love S. Korea. I first became interested in S. Korea around the age of 17 or 18. My Grandfather had recently found his S. Korean friend, Mr. Kim, from when he was in the Korean War. 
 
My Grandfathers platoon saved Mr. Kim, and gave him a job in their kitchen. During that time, my Grandfather taught Mr. Kim English and they soon became good friends. After the war ended they lost eachother for 50 years; until they finally found eachother again. 
 
Mr. Kim had visited once before, but he was coming again with some of his family. With him he brought his Daughter, Grandson, and Granddaughter. I became friends with them both, but I developed a much closer friendship with his Granddaughter. Since then, we have become the best of friends; we are so close that we even call eachother Sisters. 
 
Recently she came to study in America, but has found it difficult to adjust to college life.  I hope to help those in similar situations to better understand South Koreans. This way there will be less hurt feelings, it will be easier for Westerners to visit  S. Korea, and it will be easier for S. Koreans to visit Western countries.