Schizohuman's take on S. Korean courtesy

Today we are going to take a small break and have a guest blogger. She is the writer of the blog Schizohuman and was kind enough to be my guest blogger. Take a look at her blog after you read this if you are interested in Schizophrenia. She has allot of information on the subject.


Guest Post: A look at Cultures


In one’s culture, different types of behavior can be considered insulting to another person from another culture. Because of this, understanding how different cultures work can be a tough subject to wrap one’s head around.


According to Adler and Proctor II (2007), non-verbal gestures have different meanings in various cultures, and we tend to filter others’ behaviors through our own by our backgrounds. “Cultural background also influences the way we interpret others’ emotions as well as the way we express our own” (2007). 
Relating to Schizohuman, this makes it hard for those with mental disorders; any unintentional behavior from these disorders could be misinterpreted as offensive.  


For example, if a person has catatonic symptoms of schizophrenia such as lack of movement or speech, a person from a culture that values eye contact and engagement in conversation might think it as inattentive or boredom. 


Basic South Korean Nonverbal Gestures 


In South Korea, many basic gestures are valued in communication. Simon and Martina of the Eat Your Kimchi website demonstrate in a podcast the appropriate and inappropriate gestures South Koreans use. Some are listed here.


Appropriate gestures:

• When calling attention to someone, all fingers in had must be used and pointing down towards the ground. 
• When receiving a gift or object, both hands must be used when taking the object as a sign of respect

 Inappropriate gestures:

• When calling to someone, it is insulting to use the index finger for pointing or beckoning. 
• When calling to someone, it is insulting to have the fingers pointing upwards, even if using all fingers at once. 
• When receiving a gift or object, it is insulting to use one hand. 

Hand gestures and other nonverbal communication are important in any culture. It is vital to understand that gestures that are acceptable in one culture are not always accepted as appropriate in another. Learning the ways and communications of others cultures can help one understand their own culture and how it interacts with other people. 


References:


(2011). In Eat Your Kimchi. Retrieved April 30, 2012, from http://www.eatyourkimchi.com/how-to-use-korean-hand-gestures/


Adler, R. B., & Proctor II, R. F. (2007). Looking Out, Looking In (12th ed., pp. 209-210). Mason: Thomson Wadsworth.

Vbog

Meeting and Dating in S. Korea

Meeting Someone New

If you are visiting S. Korea of course you are going to meet many people. While doing so you will realize quite a few things.

• They will ask you many personal questions that normally a stranger would not ask back home.

This is very normal in S. Korea so do not worry about them asking you how old you are, where you work, and why you are here in S. Korea. They ask this because they want to know how they should talk to you. If you are older then they are they want to speak to you respectfully. Plus if they ask for your phone number it is because they want to be friends and get to know you better.

Dating

Dating in S. Korea is a little bit different from Western cultures. In the past you meet someone and you wait 3-4 days to call them or text them. Or they go on a double date and hang out together to get to know each other with their friends tagging along in public places. In Korea it is basically the opposite of the 3-4 day rule.

• Do not freak out when you get a text from the Korean girl or boy on the same day or the next.. This is normal and a very good sign! This means that they are interested in you but if you do not hear from them for more then 2 or so days it means that they are not interested.

Proper Gift Giving in S. Korea.

I have given my friend Seyoung and her family many gifts over the years. From my experience there is really no wrong way to give a gift here in S. Korea as a foreigner being everyone is very understanding. But if you wish to know about this information here it is!

• Never give a gift wrapped in white or in a white bag. White is normally what S. Korean's wear to a funeral. Stick with bright colors and patterns or just solid colors other then white.
• Stay away from multiples of 4 because the number 4 is considered unlucky. Which means don't give 4, 8, 12, and 16 items to someone.
• If you are receiving a gift never open it in front of the person who gave it. Always ask before opening it if it is alright for you to do so in front of them.
• Anything is acceptable as a gift. I have given Seyoung and her family things I have made. I have also given them things I have bought and they seemed to love anything I gave them. But try not to go overboard with the price because they will sometimes return the favor in appreciation for the gift. 
• Do not give a gift just so you can get gifts in return.

Things that are considered rude in S. Korea.

These are just some behaviors or things I think are very important to know before going to Korea or into a Korean home. I have personally learned this information or experienced these things during my visit in S. Korea over the years. They may or may not be correct being this is from my point of view so please bare with me and let me know if it is incorrect. 

Rude behavior  in general.

• Do not walk into a S. Korean home with your shoes on. Always take your shoes off before entering someones home. Traditional restaurants also require you to do this as well. So if you see that the floor is raised at the entrance and there are rows of shoes at the entrance, take them off.. This is to keep the house or restaurant clean and keep dirt from being tracked inside. Even if you think your feel are to smelly to do so, take off your shoes. S. Koreans take this very seriously.
• Talking very loudly on the bus, subway, in someones home, or in a restaurant. Use your inside voices in places like these because sometimes you will be told to "Shhh." others. 
• Staring into someone eyes. This is considered to be aggressive behavior and very rude. I am not saying to not look at the persons face but try not to make to much eye contact. In America when your parents want you to listen and tell the truth they force you to look them in the eyes while doing so... You don't have to do that here.

Acceptable S. Korean Table Manners

During the time I have been friends with Seyoung and when I visited S. Korea in person, I have learned quite a few things about Korean table manners. They have many rules for when they eat compared to our own., but if you are eating with a Korean family, visiting Korea, or working in Korea as a foreigner try not worry about it to much.

Because S. Koreans are normally very understanding but if you want to make a good first impression what I am about to list will help. Many of these rules deal with respect for your elders and those around you.

Polite, respectful behavior, and manners during your Meal.

• Waiting for the elder of the group to sit down first before you take your seat.
• Waiting for the oldest person to lift their spoon or chopsticks to eat before you do.
• Take your time eating and do not finishing before your elders.
• Eating rice with a spoon.
• Eat soups with a spoon.
• Picking up things to put in your plate with chopsticks.
• Pour drinks or others first, with elders and seniors at the top of that list.
• When someone refills your drink hold it with both hands. With elders, have one holding the glass then have the other holds the bottom of the glass..
• When refilling someone else's drink support your hand with your other or support your elbow.
• Place your chopsticks or spoon back on the table.
• Do not waste food, eat only what you need, and don't take excessive amounts of food.
• Always thank the person who treated you to a meal in their home or in public.
• If you have to sneeze or cough at the table always turn away and cover your mouth while doing so.
• If you use a toothpick at the table cover your mouth so no one else can see.
• When drinking alcohol with an elder turn to the side to take a drink.

Rude table behavior.

• Blowing your nose at the table.
• Touching everything and moving the food in the main bowls with your chopsticks to much.
• Pouring your own drink.
• Refusing Alcohol from an elder.
• Sticking your chopsticks straight up in your bowl of rice. This is because it looks like traditional Korean ancestor ceremonies.
• Making allot of noise during your meal and eat as quiet as possible with your chopsticks or spoons..
• Talking while chewing your food.
• Leaving the table before the elders.
• Coughing or sneezing facing the table.
• Eating anything but finger foods with your hands.
• Reading something at the table while eating.
• Watching TV while eating.
• Having your spoon and chopsticks in the same hand while eating.
• Stabbing food with your chopsticks.
• Staring at an elder while drinking.

Please note that this is what I have learned over the years from observing others or talking with my friend Seyoung. It may or may not be correct being this is from my point of view.

How to Greet someone in S. Korea

With my personal experience in S. Korea, normally it was not a problem how I greeted everyone. They were all understanding, knew I was a foreigner, and were very helpful. I don't think it would be a problem if you went to S. Korea and just greeted them like you normally would but like America there are a mixture different personality's. Some are more understanding then others and there is always a possibility you will run into those who are not. Please understand this is what I have learned personally and from my S. Korean friend.

1.)    Before greeting anyone at all you must understand the following...

• Staring directly into someones eyes is not considered proper etiquette. In S. Korea it is considered to be rude, challenging(aggressive), and rebellious behavior. So if you are in trouble and they want you to tell the truth. Please do not do it like American's would and stare into their eyes while doing so. I am sure that you won't have to worry about this but like I have said before... there is a possibility that you might run into someone who isn't as understanding as others. Which will normally be very rare... I hope.
• You do not have to greet them in Korean but it does help to know a little and it is a nice way to break the ice.

2.)    If you are in a normal setting you are going to ask and answer these questions mentally. This determines how you will greet this person and what you should do.

•  Is this person someone you know or a stranger? 
•  Is this person younger or older then you?

3.)  The greetings.

 This person is the same age or younger then you and you know them already you normally do the following. 

• Walk up to them, just say "An-young(Hello)!" You may include their name, you can just shake their hand, or hug them. What ever you and this person are comfortable with. I normally say "An-young Seyoung!" and then give my friend a hug being we are so close. If you are not close to this person but still know them it may not be proper to hug them. But from my personal experience, outside the work place, once S. Koreans know your name you have already entered the relationship point of being a friend and are very friendly. I suggest letting them make the first move after you say hello if you are unsure of what to do after greeting them. Normally after a few times you easily figure out what kind of greeting your friend is comfortable with.

This person is older then you and you know them already a greeting similar to what is stated below would be alright. 

• This greeting is similar to the one above but the only difference is how you speak to your elder. Always speak to your elders with respect, a simple bow of the head when you greet them, and if they want to shake your hand or hug you, let them decide. I think you normally greet them formally with "An-young Ha-sey-yo(Hello)." along with their name.  This is how I greeted my elders in Korea and so far no one has corrected me. So I am guessing that they are okay with it or understand that I am trying to be courteous despite being a foreigner.

This person is younger than you and you do not know them.

• A simple "An-young." will do with a nod of the head. But if you are not sure if they may be older or not simply say "An-young Ha-sey-yo." just in case. I used this one when I met people on the street. They were very happy to hear me trying to speak to them in their own language and being we just met we normally did not shake hands. Unless by habit I held my hand out to shake theirs.

This person is your elder and you do not know them.

• This greeting is exactly the same as the one above but of course you do not know their name. A simple nod of the head will be alright and let them take the lead on if they want to shake your hand or not. I never had a elder who was a stranger offer to shake my hand really unless I held out my hand out of habit.

Jack tells us about his experiences in S. Korea.

About Jack

Jack Moon is my Grandfather and he has just recently turned 80-years-old. We are very close and I look up to him a lot. He first lived in Oklahoma and after he married my Grandmother he moved to Texas. My Grandfather served during the Korean War and has visited S. Korea recently.

The Interview

Q: How many times have you been to S. Korea and how long did you stay each time?

A:  The 1st time I was stationed there for 15 months and the 2nd time for two weeks.

Q: When you first visited S. Korea how were you greeted?

A: They were very polite to me and respectful.

Q: Was there any difference in how they greeted you in your more recent visit?

A: The first time I only really saw them at a distance at first and at the time they were starving. But I do not think there is much difference. They are still very polite and respectful.

Q: During your first visit did you eat any meals with a Korean family or Korean?

A:  No, we were passed where the civilians were at the time. But during my visit in 2010 we ate many meals with the family we were visiting there.

Q: Was there any difference in our meal etiquette and their own? 

A: There is very little difference from what I could tell.

Q: During your visits did you have anything that was hard for you to adjust to that dealt with courtesy?

A: Not really... other then feeling like I had really poor manners compared to them.

Q: Is there anything you think Westerners need to know before going to S. Korea dealing with courtesy?

A: Learn to appreciate their courtesy and be courteous back.

Q: Is there anything you would like to share with everyone about S. Korea?

A: Everything goes towards their Economy and not to the CEO's. Mark Twain said all Americans need to visit a foreign country twice. The 1st time we think we are better than them. The 2nd time to realize everything we could learn from such a great nation.

Seyoung tells us about her experience in America.

About Seyoung

Seyoung is one of my closest friends, she is in her early 20s, and is currently studying here in America from S. Korea. She has lived in S. Korea all her life but has visited America many times and is studying to get her degree in Business Management.

The Interview

Q: What made you want to study here in America?

A:  I like challenging myself and I thought studying abroad was quite challenging for me. I believed I could learn many things such as: Interacting with foreigners and improving my English skill.

Q: What was the hardest thing for you to adjust to here in America?

A:  I'll say the language barrier and cultural differences.

Q: Was there anything that you did to upset someone here in America or that someone did to upset you?

A:  American people tend to be more honest about their feelings. One day, one of my roommates said "it looks disgusting" when she saw my Korean food and it made me mad of course.

Q: When greeting a Korean in business or out on the street do you bow or shake their hand? If they are of the opposite gender do you greet them differently?

A:  In Korea if he or she is older than you, you should bow to them. If the elder ask you to shake hands, then you can do. But there is no difference when you are greeting someone of the opposite gender.

Q: When entering a room with a group of people what would be the courteous thing to do? Open the door for everyone? Let the ladies go first or oldest first? 

A:  Ladies first.

Q: When you are eating with a group what are a few things people should do or know?

A: No eating before everyone else, and offer a person food while eating. We have kind of strict rules about eating.

Q: If you are dating or married what kind of affections are considered appropriate and inappropriate for public displays of affection?
A:  I think American people are more generous about skin-ship in public. Even kissing in the public is not common in Korea.

Q: When you meet a Korean for the first time would it be okay to give them a gift? If so what kind of gift would be appropriate? Would they enjoy a store bought gift more or a handmade gift?

A:  It depends on the situation and personalities, but I do believe in most cases it’s okay to give a gift when you meet for the first time. Anything not expensive and unweighted presents would be good I guess.

Q:  After meeting a Korean for the first time when and how do you know if the two of you are friends? Is there a specific way they let you know or does it just naturally happen without anyone saying anything? What are some signs of you and your friend becoming very close friends?

A: We have 3 different language tones. One is for elders, strangers and one for friends. If they use the "friends" tone, they are probably friends.

Simon Swatski tells us about his experience living in S. Korea.

About Simon

Simon has been living in S. Korea since May 2008. He first moved there to become a English teacher with his wife and they have lived there ever since. Simon no longer teaches but he works on their blog they started for their family full time. The goal of this blog is to prepare their viewers for living in Korea and educate viewers on everything Korean.


If you want more information on Simon or want to learn other things about S. Korea visit their website Eat your Kimchi.




The Interview


Q:    While living in S. Korea, were there times you unintentionally offended or upset someone because you were unfamiliar with their customs? What did you do that offended them? Was it something that you would normally do in Canada? Did you find out why it bothered them so much or what you should have done differently? 
A:    If there has been an incident, I am unaware of it.  There have been times that I've done something inappropriate in terms of etiquette, like holding my glass incorrectly, but everyone I've interacted with was very kind in pointing out the offences, rather than taking offence to them.  Like "Oh!  That's cute, but you should probably hold it like this," to which we quickly corrected our mistakes.  Nobody has ever been visibly angry/upset over what we've done, from what I've seen.


Q:     What would be an appropriate way to apologize to a Korean you have upset/offended?
A:     In our case, we've established relationships with the Korean people we know so that they know we're trying to be as respectful as possible, and so - if we ever do a faux pas - they're kind to help us not do it again.



Q:     Is there anything that foreigners should expect so that they don’t get offended themselves?
A:      Korean culture is still very homogenous, and so they aren't fully sensitive to cultural/racial differences yet, which is why foreigners will be pointed at on the streets and called "foreigners!"


Q:     When you meet a Korean for the first time would it be okay to give them a gift? If so what kind of gift would be appropriate? Would they enjoy a store bought gift more or a handmade gift?
A:     We did when we first came here.  We brought them for our principals and vice principals:  a bottle of whisky for the men and body lotion for the women.


Q:     After meeting a Korean for the first time when and how do you know if the two of you are friends? Is there a specific way they let you know or does it just naturally happen without anyone saying anything?
A:     For us, it's natural.  There's no announcement of "Yes!  We are now friends!  Let us commence our friendship henceforth!"


Q:     When you are going to a business meeting what would be considered good etiquette when you first meet another company’s representative? Would you shake their hand or bow? 
A:     We just shake hands and bow.


Q:     When greeting a Korean of the opposite sex do you have to greet them differently? Would it be proper to shake their hand?
A:     We shake hands and bow, like above.


Q:     When entering a room with a group of people what would be the courteous thing to do? Open the door for everyone? Let the ladies go first or oldest first? 
A:     We don't go out in big groups of people, so we're not sure.  We just maintain our regular codes of conduct: hold doors for people, ladies first, such and such.

Confucianism: 5 Relationships

In Confucianism there are 5 different types of important relationships.  As everyone makes their way through life and society we interact with these 5 relationships constantly. Through these 5 relationships we become human and find our humanity if we do it correctly. Either way our lives are intertwined with these 5 relationships constantly. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Parent and Child  (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Husband and Wife  (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Older Brother and Younger Brother (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Friend and Younger (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

• Ruler and Subject (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

One must obey the older one and the other must take care of those under them. If the ones in power follow the teachings of Confucianism  they will not take advantage of those under them. If the ones obeying follow the teachings of Confucianism they will not disobey and disrespect those in power. Doing this they would be able to live in perfect harmony.

Works Cited

1. GNU Free Documentation License. (n.d.). Confucianism: Relationships & filial piety. Retrieved from http://www.lumrix.net/medical/ethics/confucianism.html
2. Mryer777. (2007, July 2). 5 relationships of Confucianism. Retrieved from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nn7grjTpcNA
3. Pilgrim, G. (2011, September 21). Introduction to Confucianism and five relationships. Retrieved from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/introduction-to-confucianism-and-five-relationships.html 
4. The Chicago Education Alliance & the Postsecondary Leadership Council. (2003, May 21).Confucianism: Social relations. Retrieved from http://www.chicagoedalliance.org/John Gifted Class/John Gifted Class/Gifted 200203/Project Void China Jacob/Confucianism.htm
5. n.a. (n.d.). Teachings of confucius. Retrieved from http://www.godpaths.com/confucianism.html

Confucianism: Fundamental Principals

Fundamental Principals

Confucius believed that a person must live by these principles to be considered the ideal man or the perfect man.

• Li -  having self-restraint, good manners, always acting in a honorable way, respecting elders, respecting ancestors, and family members. One should not be selfish in their acts. But still should have personal ambitions, aspirations, and at the same time should not be unjust to others while achieving them. While following social etiquette and mannerisms. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
•  Hsiao - A love for your immediate family and then society. Parents loving their children and children loving their parents. With families happy and together, the society will prosper. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Yi -  the principle of righteousness, upholding what is right above all else, and  sacrificing yourself for it if needed. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Xin - be honest in life, with oneself, and with the people around you. Doing this will build trust and confidence among  those you know. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Jen - This principle is the most important of all principles. Be kind and humane to all around you. Share and understand one another without being judgmental. Even if someone behaves badly with you, think about what has happened to them, and what is making them act like this.  (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Chung - loyalty to one's family and country. Doing this binds a country together. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

Works Cited

1. Ontario Consultants on Religious Tolerance. (1995-2009).Confucianism: Beliefs, teachings, and relationships. Retrieved from http://www.religioustolerance.org/confuciu2.htm
2. Peace. (2008, June 3). Principles of confucianism. Retrieved from http://www.peaceinspiration.com/2008/06/03/principles-of-confucianism/
3. Pilgrim, G. (2011, September 21). Introduction to Confucianism and five relationships. Retrieved from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/introduction-to-confucianism-and-five-relationships.html 
4. ReligionFacts. (2002-2012). Confucianism: Beleifs. Retrieved from http://www.religionfacts.com/a-z-religion-index/confucianism.htm
5. Scott, S. (n.d.). Confucianism: The tenets of confucianism. Retrieved from http://truthmagazine.com/archives/volume34/GOT034139.html

Confucianism: What is it?

What is Confucianism?

• The teachings of Confucius.(1, 2, 3)
• It is an ethical and social belief or philosophy rather then a religion. (1, 2, 3, 5 )
• Confucianism describes the position or relationship of a person in Korean society and focuses on: duty, loyalty, honor, filial piety, and sincerity. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
• Has an emphasis on: family, bettering yourself, respecting your elders, and respecting authority. (1, 2, 5)
• Stresses the obligations of the people towards each other based on their relationships and places in society. ( 4, 5)
• Confucianism stresses being able to live together as humans, humanity, and the human relationship . (1, 2, 3,  5)

Works Cited

1. Asia Society. (2012). Confucianism. Retrieved from http://asiasociety.org/countries/religions-philosophies/confucianism
2. Farlex, Inc. (2012). Confucianism. Retrieved from http://www.thefreedictionary.com/Confucianism
3. Dictionary.com (2012). Confucianism. Retrieved from http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/confucianism?__utma=1.1588331685.1335064693.1335064693.1335073196.2&__utmb=1.4.10.1335073196&__utmc=1&__utmx=-&__utmz=1.1335064693.1.1.utmcsr=(direct)|utmccn=(direct)|utmcmd=(none)&__utmv=-&__utmk=131256463
4. Patheos Inc. (2008 - 2011). Principles of Moral Thought and Action. Retrieved from http://www.patheos.com/Library/Confucianism/Ethics-Morality-Community/Principles-of-Moral-Thought-and-Action.html
5. The Korean. (January 6, 2011). Confucianism and Korea - Part II: What is Confucianism? Retrieved from http://askakorean.blogspot.com/2011/01/confucianism-and-korea-part-ii-what-is.html

Confucianism History

Before we can start learning about South Korean Courtesy we must first know some things about the strong influences that helped build it, Confucianism. Confucianism has been an important influence on S. Korea as well as many other eastern countries.(1, 4)

Origin

Confucianism are the theories and philosophies of a Chinese scholar, Confucius, of the 5th-6th century B.C.E. in China. Confucius's teachings have influenced China, Japan, Vietnam, and Korea. Confucianism works towards good relationships and peace in any country. (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

All of Confucius's teachings were recorded by his students and then their students(1, 3, 4). It was discarded around 220 C.E. when the Han Dynasty fell(1, 6) . In the next dynasty, the Qin Dynasty, people who did not agree with Confucianism were authorized to burn any reference to it(1, 6). Because of this there are many gaps in Confucius’s teachings and sometimes contradicted itself(1). By the 7^th (700 BCE) century Confucianism reappeared and was brought back into practice.(1, 2, 6)

It was later mixed in with Buddhism and Taoism to create laws that state the correct way relationships establish peace as well as bring more followers.(1, 6)

Works Cited

1. Conjecture Corporation. (2003-2012). What is Confucianism?. Retrieved from      http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-confucianism.htm
2. Hays, J. (2008-20011). History of Confucianism. Retrieved from  http://www.factsanddetails.com/world.php?itemid=1175&catid=55&subcatid=357
3. Patheos Inc. (2008 - 2011). Confusianism: Definition, history & origin. Retrieved from  http://www.onelittleangel.com/wisdom/quotes/confucianism.asp
4. Pilgrim, G. (2011, September 21). Introduction to Confucianism and five relationships. Retrieved from http://www.buzzle.com/articles/introduction-to-confucianism-and-five-relationships.html 
5. Scholastic Inc. (2012). Asian pacific american heritage. Retrieved from http://teacher.scholastic.com/researchtools/researchstarters/asian-american/
6. n.a. (n.d.). Confucianism : Definition, history & origin. Retrieved from http://www.onelittleangel.com/wisdom/quotes/confucianism.asp

Introduction

About this Blog

In this blog I will cover many things about S. Korean courtesy. 

• Confucianism 
• Etiquette 
• Manners
• Acceptable behavior and In-acceptable behavior
• Non-verbal communication

These are only a few and I will not be going over them in this exact order. Also many of these will overlap with one another.

About Me

Hello my name is Melonie, I am 27-years-old, and I love S. Korea. I first became interested in S. Korea around the age of 17 or 18. My Grandfather had recently found his S. Korean friend, Mr. Kim, from when he was in the Korean War. 
 
My Grandfathers platoon saved Mr. Kim, and gave him a job in their kitchen. During that time, my Grandfather taught Mr. Kim English and they soon became good friends. After the war ended they lost eachother for 50 years; until they finally found eachother again. 
 
Mr. Kim had visited once before, but he was coming again with some of his family. With him he brought his Daughter, Grandson, and Granddaughter. I became friends with them both, but I developed a much closer friendship with his Granddaughter. Since then, we have become the best of friends; we are so close that we even call eachother Sisters. 
 
Recently she came to study in America, but has found it difficult to adjust to college life.  I hope to help those in similar situations to better understand South Koreans. This way there will be less hurt feelings, it will be easier for Westerners to visit  S. Korea, and it will be easier for S. Koreans to visit Western countries.